| Author(s) | Friedrich Engels |
|---|---|
| Written | 8 August 1892 |
ENGELS TO AUGUST BEBEL
IN BERLIN
Ryde, England, 8 August 1892 The Firs, Brading Road
Dear August,
Your card received this morning. My dear fellow, the whole thing has fallen through and I am the odd man out! My old trouble, which obliges me to wear a complicated bandage and about which I have told you various details, has reared its head again after five years of inactivity and all at once completely crippled me. I had already sus- pected something of the kind during your visit,[1] but it was so insig- nificant that I paid no attention to it, thinking that, as it had often done on previous occasions, it would finally clear up of its own accord here in the sea air. On Saturday[2] I walked about 1¾ kilometres, rested for half an hour or so and then came back — a mere 3½ km in all — and by the evening realised that the crisis was upon me and that instead of going to Germany I should have to spend a month here, resting and abstaining from alcohol, if I was to get myself up to the mark again. At this moment I should merely have to walk a thou- sand paces to be banished to a sofa for 8 or 10 days. Thus do the best laid plans come to nothing!
As to the cause, all I can say is that since last August I have been addressing myself to the bottle more liberally than for many years and that the accumulated effect eventually brought about this result. Anyhow, I can find no other explanation for the thing, especially since it is a condition of the cure that one must abstain from alcohol during such time as symptoms of localised inflammation are notice- able. How delighted your son-in-law[3] will be! — though the conclu- sion he'll doubtless draw will not be shared by me.
At any rate I am totally incapable of making the projected trip in this condition. At most I might get as far as my brothers in Engelskir- chen, but certainly not Zurich and so, despite this rotten bit of luck, I cannot but congratulate myself that the attack did not happen on my travels, leaving me completely hors de combat in a foreign land. Now I can at least doctor myself here at Pumps' and in a month's time I shall, I imagine, be fairly mobile again. The thing is of no con- sequence, save for the tedium; I have weathered it three or four times already and am familiar with the treatment, the more so through having devised it myself as a result of my own experience, since the good doctors were, with one exception, and he is dead, all of them ut- terly mystified by the case.
I at once wrote to Louise yesterday, telling her that she should make no changes whatever in her plans and on no account hasten her return even by so much as a day.[4] However it is highly probable that you, like her, will now prefer to make other arrangements, in which case you will have to resume your correspondence about it.
Tell your wife and daughter[5] that I am doubly sorry that, as a re- sult of what has happened, I shall be deprived of the pleasure of mak- ing their personal acquaintance as also that of your son-in-law. But to postpone is not to put off for ever, and the bitter experience of the present year will make me a wiser man in the next when, I trust, I shall still be alive and once again nimble on my pins. And then we shall make the same trip, if not an even better one.
My address up till the end of August will be as on the letterhead. Rosher's name is not necessary, but letters will be delayed unless ad- dressed to The Firs, Brading Road.
So my warm regards to you all, and do please drink to my recov- ery. Since I am now abstaining in his stead, Dr Simon might even permit himself a sip for once!
Your old friend
F. Engels