| Author(s) | Elisabeth Engels |
|---|---|
| Written | 5 December 1848 |
To Friedrich Engels in Berne
Barmen, 5 December 1848
Dear Friedrich,
Yesterday a letter arrived from you at long last[1] and although I was grieved by the tone in which it was written, I was nevertheless glad to hear that all was well with you and that you had received the money. I shall not hark back to your speech at the Eiser Hall except to say that we first read it in the Deutsche Zeitung,[2] which they take at the Concordia,[3] and only later did it also appear in the Elberfelder.[4]
Now as to the suspicions your friends have incurred, let me tell you quite simply how matters stood. When the disturbances broke out in Cologne and the Rheinische Zeitung[5] was suspended,[6] we heard immediately that you had already earlier left for Verviers. For what reason, no one knew. But nobody, ourselves included, doubted that the meetings at which you and your friends spoke, and also the language of the Rh. Z., were largely the cause of these disturbances. You, too, will be perfectly well aware that this led to bitter feeling, since most of the country desires a return to peaceful and orderly conditions. We then got your letter from Liège and I could not but agree with your father when he expressed the hope that, if you were compelled to fend for yourself, you might perhaps decide, or have to decide, to turn to activities other than those which you have been pursuing in recent years and which have already caused us so much distress. You must not imagine, dear Friedrich, that, when your father made his proposals to you in the letter he sent to Brussels, he did so without my assent. I was in complete agreement with him and hoped that you would either fall in with the proposal that you go to America or, should you cease to receive money from us, that you would make up your mind to take up something else so as to be able to exist.
Just at the time when we received your letter from Liège, our Emil arrived here from Engelskirchen via Cologne, where he had inquired at the editorial office of the Rh. Z. whether they knew anything about you, and was told in reply that the editors were all expected back on the following day and that the paper would be reappearing within the next few days. As you yourself know, it was not long before this happened,[7] so what could be more natural than that I should imagine that Marx and the others were back in Cologne? A little later, your father went to Cologne where he heard from Plasmann, as I told you in my letter, that several letters had arrived from you, in which you asked for money but that none had yet been sent to you—I mentioned this in an earlier letter. A few days later Plasmann actually sent us a letter of yours, addressed to one Schulz and written, if I am not mistaken, in Brussels, in which you complain that they have not replied to your letters, including one to Mrs Marx. About this time we read of your expulsion from Brussels and, not having heard at all whether you had received the money in Brussels, we grew anxious and your father wrote to Gigot, who soon replied, saying he had handed you the money and giving us the address to which I wrote to you in Paris. We then got your letter from Geneva in which you told us that, for the first fortnight, you could expect nothing from your friends as 'they had all been dispersed'. Was I not forced to conclude from this that you did not know that the Rh. was again appearing and hence that the editors must also be there?
I do not wish to say anything further about Marx; if he acted in the way you describe, and I do not doubt this for one moment, he did what he could and in my heart I thank him for it. As to your other Cologne friends, I do not wish to discuss them further, for you yourself say little about them, so we shall let the matter rest. Time will tell who is most dependable. They were, by the way, at great pains to send us your address when they heard from Gigot that we had been making inquiries about it. We got it from three sources[8] at the very time your letter arrived from Geneva.
I am sorry to see from your letter that you imagine us to be responsible for the hard time you had in Geneva. But that often happens to people. They willingly blame others for things for which they are themselves responsible. Why did you have to leave Cologne? You know yourself, dear Friedrich, how often I expressed concern that one day you might again come to such a pass, but you always said that that was out of the question. We then had no word from you for five weeks, neither a letter nor your address, so how could you expect us to send you money? No sooner did we receive word from you, than we sent you some. It is surely not our fault if you received it so belatedly.
There is many a thing I could say in reply to your letter, but what purpose would it serve? We cannot, after all, agree on everything, so it is better to hold one's peace. Except for one thing, dear Friedrich. I have learned from a fairly reliable source a thing or two about your plans in Cologne, and I must say that when one plans to build barricades one is not so far from murder. Thank God such plans are not all carried out. Later, perhaps, we can discuss this affair, you had best not reply concerning it. Now for another matter. Plasmann sent us your things, which arrived, I am happy to say, while your father was still away, for amongst them I discovered various letters which I would rather did not find their way into your father's hands. I prefer to withhold from him matters which may distress him or cause him anxiety, for I consider it unnecessary to tell him everything I know, but if asked I do not knowingly tell anything but the truth, as you too will have discovered. Amongst the letters in your trunk I found one addressed to 'Madame Engels' and one from a lady to yourself, written in French though from Cologne. Both these letters I burnt unread and at once put all the other letters together in the leather brief-case, so that there is little probability of your father seeing them. Those two letters might perhaps have given me the explanation why last spring,[9] when we had that talk together in the garden, you were not being truthful with me. Whatever your relations may have been at the time and may perhaps still be, it is as well to let the matter rest. Do not write to me about it, for I am most anxious that your father should hear nothing of the matter. Later on, perhaps, you might give me an explanation by word of mouth. But I only wish to hear the truth. If you cannot tell me that, it would be better for us not to speak at all on the subject. Now that you have got the money from us, I entreat you to buy yourself a warm overcoat so that you will have it when the weather turns colder, as it soon will; also to provide yourself with drawers and a bed jacket so that you will be warmly clad should you catch a cold, as can very easily happen. I only wish I had occasion to send you some warm socks. Your father, however, thinks it would cost more than they are worth and says I ought to keep them and everything else until you are closer to us again.
What more can I say to you, dear Friedrich? That I love you as only a mother can love her child, you know. May God shine His light upon your heart that you may know what will bring you peace. It is already one o'clock in the morning and I too shall now go to bed. May God's grace and mercy go with you.
With much love
Your mother Elise
Your father returned from his trip last Friday but left again today for Engelskirchen.
Hermann, Hedwig, Rudolf and Elise send their love.